Our rescued Persian cat Ugur tried to starve himself to death because he misses his two dads who went to England. After much experimentation we found something that stopped his hunger strike - baby Norwegian salmon, lightly killed to death by bathing them in a golden cup of unicorn tears, freshly tinned by elves wearing gloves made of troll hair - finally the tins fashioned from Einsteinium are flown in by helicopter and delivered to the end customer by winch. The moggy liked this so much that we bought a crate that was on special offer aaaaaaaaaand.... wait for it.... he's bloody allergic to fish we have now discovered.
I want to kill him.
No comments:
Post a Comment